Sunday, June 29, 2014

On Getting Engaged


So.  I'm in this phase of my life where like everyone is getting engaged.  It started slowly, with one couple, then a few months later another, and suddenly, in the last few weeks, three couples I know have gotten engaged.  And so, I say again, SIGH.

I knew this phase was coming.  It's a natural phase of life.  One day, your friends are single and going on dates with different people each weekend.  Then, later, they find someone.  They date awhile.  And suddenly, one day, you wake up and all your friends are engaged.  Well.  I knew it was coming, but I didn't think it would start so soon.  I just finished my first year of undergrad, and in a lot of ways, I still feel really young.  Way too young to get engaged.

The Boyfriend and I have been together for some time now.  We're very happy and we love each other a lot.  But we aren't about to get married.  Have we talked about it?  Sure.  But in the "someday" way, not in the "soon" way.  And I'm happy that way.  I don't want to get engaged.  Not anytime soon.

Because here's the thing I think people forget about getting engaged: it's a precursor to GETTING MARRIED.  And GETTING MARRIED is a huge deal.  Getting engaged is cute.  You get a cute little ring and you get to post cute pictures of you and your new fiancé on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook....everywhere.  You ask your girls to be bridesmaids with cute little gifts.  You pick out a cute dress, plan a cute ceremony.  All that is fun.  Cutesy.  Pretty.  People are congratulating you, practically choking on the cutesy-ness of it all.  But then comes REALITY.  You GET MARRIED.  When you GET MARRIED, you're an adult.  It's a new phase of your life.  You're committed to one person for the rest of your life.  The two of you are a team.  You live life together.  And all that sounds great.  You're forever in love, right?  Yeah.  But it's also a lot of work.  And at least in my mind, all that stuff belongs separate from undergrad.  The two don't go hand-in-hand.  They go in separate boxes.  I can see getting engaged in college.  But GETTING MARRIED while in college?  Slow down.  What's the rush?  I mean, I understand that when you've been together forever you just want to start life with that person.  But calm down.  It's not a race.

No comments:

Post a Comment